Binder & Binder Comments

Comments on the old posts continue. Over a year ago, I had some issues with the cowboy hat worn by a lawyer in a shitty commercial that airs on NY1. Follow the link to the old post if you're interested in reading all of the comments (including one from a former employee! Look out!).

But allow me to draw your attention to one in particular. This week, I received a comment from a fella called Greg, who offered a link to his investigative report on Mr. Binder, Esq. He has conveniently embedded the ad in question, so that you can enjoy the cowboy hat in all its glory. Greg's mom emailed Binder & Binder (awesome), and received a reply to her inquiry about the hat, among other things.

Enjoy the hell out of it, B&E readers, and nice work, Greg, for actually pursuing the information.

And according to Greg, Charles "Cowboy Hat" Binder is bald under that sucker. Nice.

Mordant Has an Awesome Name

It's that time again, B&E readers. I have recently received some terrific comments from some terrific readers, and I'm now sharing one of them with you.

Some of you may recall that when the missus and I visited Sweden a few years back, I had a few thoughts about the many Swedes with their many dreadlocks. Well, a fellow called Mordant, if that is indeed his name, took umbrage:

I don't usually post on blogs either and I live in Sweden and what you are talking is utter rubbish..You are a closeminded moron btw. And furthermore I have dreads and a doctorate, I don't see your point! What have you done lately to improve your society. You should go out and do some social work rather than write utter drivel on blog sites!

Well, Mordant, if that is indeed your name it is the most awesome name in the world. Oh, wait, excuse me, Mordant. You said you have a doctorate, so I should be calling you Dr. Mordant. Dr. Mordant, I apologize to you and your dreadlocks. I'm sorry to have insulted you, your dazzling intellect, and your style sense. Please forgive me my trespasses against your person, your higher degree, and your locks aplenty. And seriously, Dr. Mordant, I wish I had your name. It is awesome.

And as a point of clarification, Dr. Mordant. I don't write utter drivel on blog sites. I write utter drivel on MY blog site. Technically, you are the guest here. But hey, since you have the post-college degree and the tangled, matted hair, you can be as rude as you wish to be. On my blog. Please visit any time, Dr. Mordant.

Your name is awesome.

Heather Must've Made that Nasty Potato

Hey, B&E readers! I've insulted a Scot! And it wasn't even the missus!

Heather didn't much care for my review of the bad Scottish cuisine from our trip last May. And apparently she didn't stick around long enough to read my raves about the better food.

Alas, she seemed particularly irritated at my attitude toward the baked potato with tuna mayonnaise:

What did he expect when he ordered a baked potato with tuna mayo? And what's wrong with tuna in a potato anyway?

Bloody typical yank.

Why don't you just stay over in America and eat your McDonald's you tosser.

Well, I couldn't say nothing, so I posted the following comment back, one I don't expect Heather will ever see:

Dearest Heather, if that is indeed your name...

First of all, I'm not sure what about this posting makes you think I'm a bloody typical yank. I'm married to a Scotswoman, and her father (who ordered the tuna-in-a-potato concoction) is also a Scot. I think that makes me an atypical Yank.

Also, I'm not bleeding.

Secondly, I don't eat at McDonald's. It McSucks.

Thirdly, I love Scotland and the Scots, which might explain why I fell in love with and married one.

Fourthly, Scotland relies on tourism for its economy, and insulting the tourists won't do much for the future of the country.

Fifthly, when my father-in-law ordered a baked potato with tuna mayo, he was expecting both the potato and the tuna mayo to be edible. They weren't.

Sixthly, tuna in a potato is like putting corn on a pizza. If you're still reading this, Heather, I would like you to explain this particular phenomenon to me as well.

Seventhly, I don't particularly want to stay over in America all the time. It's good to get out of the country for a change in perspective once in a while. When we Americans don't see the world, we tend to invade countries. Not good.

Eighthly, I only occasionally toss, but fair point.

Ninthly, the missus has much to say to you about this, but this is my blog, so she can either add her own comment or stop telling me what to write.

I would like to express to Heather my deepest and sincerest apologies for insulting her national cuisine.

Because I may well someday live in Heather's home country, it is not a good idea for me to burn any bridges. Can we be friends, Heather? Maybe Facebook friends? Can I follow you on Twitter?

Comments That Make Me Happy

I've had "a week," as people say, so I haven't focused much energy on B&E in the past few days. I still don't have much to say, so let me turn to people who say things in the B&E comments section instead.

For reasons probably having to do with Google, several old posts seem to garner more attention than others and continue to reap the benefits of comments long after they were written.

To my screed against dreadlocks (in relation to their ubiquity in Sweden), I received this comment, from Anonymous (if that is indeed his or her name):

I usually dont comment on blogs, but the sheer stupidity of this post left me with no choices...

Get a life man....seriously..

This one really made me happy. I offer no defense for my stupidity except to say, "Watch your use of ellipses and apostrophes. And your dreadlocks don't look nearly as good as you think they do, Whitey. Shave them."

Some of my posts on the Bad Advertising on NY1 seem to get some late attention, too. Related to my post about Hillside Honda, Anonymous (if that is indeed his or her name - gosh, I wonder if it's the same person as Dreadlocked Whitey above) writes:

Dat's my daughtah Angelah ... she's a beautiful goyl!! Ohhhhh!

What I really wish is that I could hear that last "Ohhhhh!" the way the writer intends it because I'm not sure that my reading of it is what Anonymous had in mind.

Apparently, those Binder & Binder ads are international. Who knew? Well, I know that now (and so do you) thanks to Rossvegas (if that is indeed his name):

Hey, I'm up here in Canada and we get the amazing Binder Lid™ here too. I'm guessing he's hiding a bald dome, because that hat is just WAY too ridiculous to be worn otherwise.

Nice touch on that little TM after "Binder Lid."

Those are just a few of the recent comments inspired by the latest ramblings of B&E.

I'd be remiss if I failed to mention two other things:

First of all, a special shout-out goes to Curt (Bald Bro), if that is indeed his name, for keeping us all informed in the latest of head-shavings from around the country and world.

And finally, I was pleased to learn recently that if you Google "feckless weenies," B&E is the second result. I can live with a silver medal in the "feckless weenie" category. I'd like to thank my mom and dad, my agent, and God.

Another Belated Comment

A semi-regular and odd occurrence takes place here at B&E: someone finds an old post while doing some zealous Googling and then leaves a comment. I get my alert and am occasionally disappointed that the rest of my (six) readers don't get to enjoy the brilliance therein.

Yes, it's happened again. Long-time readers may recall that the missus and I took a fantastic vacation back in 2007 to a place called Sweden. It's in Northern Europe, in an area sometimes referred to as Scandinavia.

In one of my vacation reports I discussed the shocking number of dreadlocks to be found on this nearly exclusive white population. I'm not a fan of dreadlocks on white people, as I wrote back then.

It seems that my report ruffled the feathers of a certain Will (if that is indeed his name)...

Wow both of yous are close minded fucking losers.. Stop looking at
other men and judging them if you dont like their hair and get a life,
out of all the things u probably saw you pick out peoples hair haha

"haha" indeed, Will. Good one.

There's much to respond to in Will's insightful comment, of course, from punctuation to spelling and back again, but I think that rather than get into all of that sort of snobbery, I shall instead leave it at this:

Cut off your dreadlocks, Will, if that is indeed your name. They don't look as good as you think they do.