Required Posting

In the last couple of days I was really hoping to write a little bit about Xe, the mercenary army formerly known as Blackwater. That's pronounced "zee." They retooled their website, and amazingly enough, the "history" section says nothing about the founder or the former name. Yea, rebranding!

But Xe's already getting its own bad name (just like the bad name you gave love, according to Bon Jovi). Four Xe contractors opened fire on a civilian vehicle, wounding two Afghans. That might be a problem in and of itself, but the contractors were also off-duty, drunk, and not allowed to be carrying weapons at the time.

[Web redesign story via TPM, and Xe mercenary shootings via HuffPo.]

Anyway, this is that posting I put up on B&E at least once (and sometimes twice) a year, in which I give you advance warning of an absence. I didn't take the time to line up any prearranged postings or anything, and unless my day today goes a lot differently than I imagine it will, I won't.

Yes, that's right: I'm going to be out of town, and although I'll probably have some semi-regular internet connection, come on people, it's a freakin' vacation. I'm vacating, for crying out loud.

Oh, and burglars? We have a really large person house-sitting for us, so don't get any ideas. We've given the large person permission to check our mail and kick your fucking ass. He's from Xe, the mercenary outfit formerly known as Blackwater.

"Stimulus Package" Has a Better Ring

Whenever it was that the Obama administration got the stimulus package passed with support from three Republican Senators and zero House Republicans, he sent out an email thanking his massive list for its support and announcing Recovery.gov.

What struck me about this email back then (even if I'm just getting to writing about it now) is that the bill-turned-law (refer back to "I'm just a bill, yeah, I'm only a bill, and I'm sittin' here on Capitol Hill") is called the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act.

The American Recovery and Reinvestment Act.

I understand that this is a law and not a campaign slogan, but these are the people who brought us HOPE CHANGE HOPE CHANGE HOPE CHANGE. They could do better.

What do we call this thing for short? ARARA?

Should've stuck with Stimulus Package. Or 2009 Stimulus Package. It's got zing. It's easy to remember. It feels just a little dirty. It's a much better name than Arara.

Arara sounds like a phone system. Or a dog howling at the Northern Lights. Or a stalled engine.

Gimme a Stimulus Package. Hubba-hubba.

Paramilitary Aggression, Rebranded

If your company produces a crappy operating system that the public largely rejects, you can either fix the operating system, which is really hard, or you can create a marketing campaign to convince people that there is no problem with the operating system. This is hard, too, but perhaps not as hard as making a better operating system.

If you're a soft drink company with flagging sales, you could either come up with a drink that tastes good and doesn't cause diabetes, which is really hard, or you could spend hundreds of thousands of dollars on a new brand identity. This is hard, too, but perhaps not as hard as making a better beverage.

So naturally, if you're Blackwater, known around the world as a brutal, merciless, and violent military contractor, you can change the culture and approach of your work (or get out of private warfare altogether), which is hard, or you can give your brand a complete overhaul. This is hard, too, but perhaps not as hard as stopping the killing.


This above is the until-recently logo. This logo was "refined" in late 2007 from an earlier version that was even more obvious in its cross-hair approach. The refinement apparently didn't have the desired effect, since it didn't change their reputation as an unaccountable killing machine.

So the next logical step is to change everything. Remember Phillip Morris? They created a parent organization called Altria to give the company a friendlier face to investors who didn't necessarily want to hold shares in a company producing cancer sticks.

Blackwater is now Xe (pronounced like the letter z in America, not like zed in Britain). And because the new State Department says it will not renew its contracts with Blackwater, Xe will also be shifting its focus away from "private security."

Xe will be the parent brand for all of Blackwater's sub-brands, none of which will include "Blackwater" in the name.

I can't seem to find the new logo online yet, but if it's still in progress I've got some ideas. I'm envisioning a family of dogs, riddled with bullets, puppies bleeding profusely. Underneath, the name and tagline: "Xe: the softer side of private warfare" or something along those lines. I'll keep working on it, but I think I'm onto something...